What Your Venus Sign Says About Your Love Life

Love is patient, love is kind; it makes the world go ’round, yet it’s the hardest thing to define—and, for many of us, to find! Thankfully, astrology is a wonderful tool for understanding our love needs, the qualities we seek in a partner, as well as the greatest gifts we have to offer.

But contrary to popular belief, we aren’t always compatible with everyone whose Sun sign is in the same element as ours. (The fire signs are Aries, Leo and Sagittarius; Earth signs are Taurus, Virgo and Capricorn; Air: Gemini, Libra and Aquarius; and Water: Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces.) True, there can be an easier flow and greater understanding when your Suns align, but it’s a gross oversimplification to assume that makes for a solid love match.

How to Decode the Clues in Your Natal Chart

Not everyone knows where all their planets are, of course—let alone those of all possible partners. (You can cast charts for free on astro.com.) Yet our natal charts do provide clues to good romantic connections: Venus is a strong indicator of how we think and feel about love and how we “do” relationships; Mars represents our passion; and the Moon, our desires and attractions.

There are 12 houses in an astrological chart: The first house governs self and identity, and across from that is the seventh house, which rules committed partnerships. The sign on the seventh house and its ruling planet reveal a lot about what will make for a solid bond, even if the Moon and Venus are telling a different story.

Once you find which sign your Venus is in, these descriptions can be helpful. But note, her house position and the angles she forms to other planets—plus integrating all these different components—is the key to understanding the big picture.

Venus in …

Aries:

These people are bold and direct and don’t like to waste time. They are charming and flirtatious, yet even for their assertiveness, they have a childlike appeal. Things are always exciting, as they require constant stimulation.

Upsides: They don’t play games, so you’ll always know where you stand.

Downsides: They tend to put themselves first and can be lacking in the social graces.

Best match: Betas (not alphas).

Taurus:

As the natural ruler of Taurus, Venus is at home here, able to express her love of beauty, creature comforts, food, drink and sensuality. These people are at ease in their bodies, sometimes taking physicality to extremes.

Upsides: They’re very “hands-on” and can’t get enough touch. Traditionalists, they seek solid relationships and serious commitment.

Downsides: They can be predictable, stubborn and possessive.

Best match: Slow-jamming homebodies.

Gemini:

This verbal, mental sign lives up to its quicksilver reputation. Venus in Gemini will woo you with words and keep you on your toes. They need a lot of stimulation and variety (alas, often with their lovers), which can fuel insecurity.

Upsides: They’re fun and exciting to be around and don’t get mopey.

Downsides: They can be fickle and take things very casually.

Best match: High-energy sapiosexuals.

Cancer:

Venus here makes one sensitive, emotional, moody and vulnerable. (Think of the Crab’s soft insides, surrounded by a crusty shell.) These people need total commitment and frequent reassurance. When hurt, they will nurse a grudge forever—but they also make wonderfully caring nurses!

Upsides: They will make you feel like you’re the center of their universe.

Downsides: The intense emotionality.

Best match: Patient romantics.

Leo:

Big-hearted and big-everything’d, Venus in Leo folks are studies in extremes. They live for love and have much to offer lucky partners. They are passionate, playful and sexy and thrive on PDA. The catch: they require constant praise, affection and attention.

Upsides: They are loyal to a fault.

Downsides: Their world revolves around them, and they sometimes forget others have needs, too.

Best match: Adoring subjects.

Virgo:

This is a subtle Venus placement, with natives being a bit cautious and insecure about their affections. They’re often perfectionists, which is nice when they’re following their idealistic goals, but less so when they veer into criticism and nitpicking (which is a reflection of themselves, not their partners).

Upsides: Their willingness to “work on things.”

Downsides: Their obsession with minutiae.

Best match: Confident intellectuals.

Libra:

This is Venus’s other home turf, and in Libra she expresses her profound love of beauty, comfort, sweetness and fair play—things she can’t live without. Men and women with this Venus are gentle, soft-spoken and thoughtful and can be very flirtatious (verbal sparring is their favorite foreplay).

Upsides: Their romantic nature and ability to make the drab magical.

Downsides: Seeming insincerity and fickleness.

Best match: Well-groomed romantics.

Scorpio:

These folks uphold Scorpio’s reputation as the most intense, provocative, sexual and powerful of the signs. Scorpio plays for keeps and isn’t afraid to pursue its target. Their physical appetites are legendary, as is their fierce need for intimacy and soul-merging.

Upsides: They’re tireless lovers who will go to great lengths to pleasure their partner.

Downsides: Controlling, manipulative, secretive.

Best match: Faithful lovers of intensity.

Sagittarius:

Venus in Sag is larger than life. These folks are open-minded, excitable, expansive and willing to try anything at least once. They love to laugh, including at themselves, and strive to keep things light and never crushingly heavy.

Upsides: They’ll make you laugh and accept your flaws.

Downsides: They can be commitment-averse and need a lot of time on their own.

Best match: Low-maintenance adventurers.

Capricorn:

This gives a very grounded, goal-oriented and conservative approach to love (and all things). Caps take their time, planning wisely and cautiously. Always conscious of their return on investment, they will evaluate their options deeply. If they choose you, it’s for keeps.

Upsides: You’ll always know where you stand with them.

Downsides: They can be slow-moving, private and guarded.

Best match: Future-oriented traditionalists.

Aquarius:

Venus in Aquarius likes to start off as friends first. Getting along and having endless things to talk about is important. These quirky outliers may seem aloof or hard to pin down, but while they’re not mushballs, their feelings do run deep.

Upsides: Every day will feel different, exciting and unpredictable.

Downsides: They aren’t emotionally effusive (to put it mildly).

Best match: Curious innovators.

Pisces:

This dreamy, romantic Venus placement is sweet and loving, though hard to pin down. These folks have one foot in this world and the other … who knows?! Hypersensitive, they can drown in their feelings, and it can be a challenge to connect with them. They root for underdogs and always want to help.

Upsides: They won’t judge you for your looks, wealth or status.

Downsides: They can go so far subterranean you can’t “find” them.

Best match: Misunderstood poets.

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Astrology 101: Know Your Sun Sign

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Heavenly Happenings, January 2019 edition